surviving another holiday

This has been an emotional 2 weeks, last week would have been mama's birthday (it's easy to remember as it is Joann's b'day too) I was ok with it, then I got the egg from Misty. That set the emotions that were simmering into to a full boil. That night we went to the play HATS it's about a woman turning 50. There was one part when the mother of the b'day girl gives her a gift that was the gift "its time to do what you desire and haven't done yet" this set me crying. It is a humorous play but I found it hard to laugh much. The weekend has been rough I am going through a lot of changes and not knowing and it has made me emotional as all get out. Becky being sick is hard, but hopefully they now know what is happening. She has a ligament in the stomach area that is too tight pushing on the artery to her tummy restricting blood flow and causing a lot of pain. Today they told her there is a plan of action that might help. Now if I would only find out about my job or lack of one. Even if I find out I have a job I don't know what grade or school. Then there is always the waiting to find out when they will foreclose on the house and we will be moving. I feel as if my fate is resting in the hands of many others. I wish I had my mom there to talk to, I know she couldn't solve any problems but there are days I just plain miss her, its been 25 years but there is still a whole there that can never be filled. I will be ok I know this but I am ready to be ok today! I dont do well with unknown factors. I am ready to get on with life and make decisions I guess I am learning patience and letting go.

THIS IS SO EASY TO MAKE, IT TAKES LONGER TO SHOP THAN TO MAKE. i FOUND THE TUTORIAL ON READYMADE, NOW BECKY WANTS TO USE THEM AT HER WEDDDING SO BACK TO WALMART i GO TO BUY MORE PLATES YAHOO...I LOVE EASY FUN THINGS TO MAKE...by the way the house and laundry were ignored today, but I did finish the book I was reading

spring break

Yahoo I am on my first spring break in 8 years, usually we only get good friday off this year we get friday and monday! Next year (if I am working) it will be a whole week. Joann has to work so I get a couple of days home alone. I have my own TO DO LIST: clean my craft room (it has been trashed since I found out I was becoming a grandma!) make a hootie hider for a shower gift laundry I thought I might put away sweaters but its been in the 60s again, read a book, waatch a movie, and the list keeps on going. It is nice to be able to think of the time to do something, and Idid not bring any school work home.

yahoo 4 days off!

ok so I did it again, I am known for saying one thing and the world hears it completely different. This morning I read on FB that my oldest was not feeling well, so I commented, now you will get to experience "motherhood" or some such thing....she responded back very quickly I AM NOT PG. hello that was the last thing I thought of, the deal is she babysits a 6mo old (who just got out of the hosp with RSV) and a 4 yr old on Tuesdays and has for a few years. I was thinking being sick and having kids!

How can I be almost 58 and still not "get it" sometimes. They do tell me I keep them laughing at work.

stressed mama

talked to Becky today, for the past 5 weeks she has had severe stomach pains. They found out she has ulcers in her ecophogaus, intestines, stomach. They have tested her for crones, colitis, and many other things. They don't know what is causing the ulcers, the Dr finally gave her some vicoden for the pain. It has been so painful she cant hold the baby to nurse.
Today she went for another "scope" and they found out she has a blocked vein...yet another doctor this time a vascular surgeon.
In the meantime she has taken matters into her own hands and went to an acupuncturist this is helping her more than anything.
It is so hard to be in Modesto with her in Portland. I just want to take time off and go up there and help, but alas I have to have faith and let God and Jim take care of her. Being a mom is so hard.

Becky (AJ's m0m) wanted a tutu for alice to have her picture taken in.....so I made one. They are so easy to make and fun, The first one was red, yellow and orange. Then I went on to this one and of course had to add to it ribbons and flowers. It was fun I see many more tutus in the future. Alice did not like the way it tasted or felt (at first) but she got used to it. She is so photogentic Becky took this with just a little kodak type camera....its all in the model and the tutu